{LOVE}

2011-03-17T06:02:00.000-07:00

I can't believe that they actually stood up for me :D

I can't believe that.

I guess, I'm loved after all

Thanks guys (:

2010-08-04T06:22:00.000-07:00

Nooo, I can't believe I blew this. It was seemingly so, damn, easy. I guess that's what life is, isnt it? It hits you when everything seems picturesquely perfect. Woah.

I won't update this blog anymore. Penning down my thoughts online, is an insult to my privacy. I have been an idiot all along. Always is, always am. Dont know why I never realised that before. :B

Bye people!

-you know you love me- <3

2010-07-18T00:48:00.000-07:00

Awesomeeez. Big walk today! Woke up at 5am hehe (: just before the walk officially began, I took a balloon. Lalalala heh flying balloon! Lovelove! Unknowingly, it slipped my hand, and I looked up to realise that it has gone up up up into the sky. The colour contrast is rather absurd, honestly, striking yellow set against a background of pale blue.. Okay that's not the main point. It got me thinking. Just seconds ago, it was right there fastened in my hand, and in the blink of an eye, it's gone, and I will not have have another chance to reverse this order of events anymore.. I must make sure that I minimise as much as possible the things that I will come to regret in life.

Anywayy. I got to walk on the actual circuit track that the f1 drivers go through. I was in a daze, dreaming about the upcoming sg grand prix throughout the entire walk. Haha, silly me. My mum says if I get 6 points for Os, she will consider getting a seat for me at the paddock. Oh yeah, it totally serves as a source of motivation for me! (:

Ohman. I told myself that you aren't important, but deep down, I know that you'll always will be. Thus. I shall concede that you do matter. ):

I realllly hope kimi will come back next year, and revert back to his old self in 2007, at his prime, and achieve a miracle all over again. Hehe :D

At the end of years, there's a chopin competition. It slipped my mind ): idk whether I should join... Nvm, I'll discuss wif my teacher and maul about it later. It's for the experience anyways (:

Righttt. It has come to my realization that this post is really random, from f1 to chopin (no link, girl) -.- whatever, that actually depicts my character well ahaha :DDD

Gotta go study, there's a MGS strings concert in the evening. Looking forward to it (: ciaoo humans ! ^^

2010-07-13T04:41:00.001-07:00

REALIZATION FOR TODAY: CHARLYN LEE PEI YI IS A NAGGY WOMAN. But she doesnt succeed! OH AND SHE IS NOT STRAIGHT. She is crooked. :BB

HEHEH OKAY BYEBYE (:

p.s. chinese remedial._.

2010-07-11T08:18:00.001-07:00

Today.. I just slacked around.

Amanda you shall stop slacking. I must strive to be a model student :D

just finished watching f1! hehe, it was awesomezz, cuz alonso had a penalty drivethrough. I wish he has one every race (:

teehee, gooodnight.

i want to dream of lollipops, strawberries, and what-not. anything but the lit test tmr!

NETHERLANDS JIAYOU!

2010-07-10T00:47:00.000-07:00

The previous post is a self reflection, and isn't directed to anyone (:

Jasmine, stay strong, for yourself, and for everyone else who loves you . I'm sure you can pull through this, girl (:

2010-07-10T00:09:00.000-07:00

Life is unfair, it always is. I hate to reminisince about the past, because when I do analyse and dissect my life, I realise how fruitless it has been.

Farewell, has been rather.. Daunting?! I don't know whether that word is appropiate for it. Nevertheless, that's my impressoon of it, so bear with me alright? :) I will especially miss the seniors, esp my twin, standpartner, and busmate. They have brought about precious memories of inexplicable joy and sorrow for me. I don't know whether I am deemed as significant in their eyes, but either way, it's fine by me. Priceless lessons learnt, tears shed, and raging emotions, are just but what a typical adolescent goes through. Everyone has setbacks, and the difference is how one goes about solving them. To stay strong and perservere, or to admit defeat?

I'm really blessed to have seniors whom constantly guide me throughout emotional turmoils, turmoils that even I lost faith in myself, positive that I couldnt escape this setback unscathed. It's really touching when one gives up and allows Fate to overwhelm them, but their seniors still fight so hard for her.

Thank you, if any of you are reading this, for being a constant source of light and guidance to me. I won't ever, ever forget the wonderful memories we had together (:

Esp.
may loh, thanks so much. Thanks for everything, for just being there through it all (:

...

Baby, baby, baby, how I wish the rain would come, and wash away my tears. Sardonic isn't it? Humans are gifted with the prvilege to be able to feel and love, and yet many veils these privileges within them, till a point when one can't bottle them any longer. Idiots, I say. I'm no exclusion.

This is paraphrased from Celine Dion's song, Because You Loved Me. Its really motivational, and I think that its rather suitable for this post.

For all those times you stood by me
For all those times that you made me see
For all those times when you looked at me
You saw the best there was in me
You gave me love when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith cuz you believed,
I'm everything I am because,
You loved me.

Cya! Till next time (:

2010-07-09T06:36:00.000-07:00

Today's farewell. Why can't you make it happier for me? Why must both of you fight all the time? It was a day I looked forward too, yet when I got home, you spoiled it for me.

I feel so damn empty inside .

2010-07-05T03:27:00.001-07:00

hiya!

tomorrow's piano exam! ahh, calm down amanda! I can do it! My tuition teacher told me, every teacher wants the best for the students, no teacher would purposely spite any student . I will go there and enjoy the music, as well as share the joy of music with the examiner (: JIAYOU ME :D

About the previous blog post, I'm really sorry dear ._. I do love you, I guess I was overwhelmed by my emotions, and needed to let it out ... I never ever mean anything I type, it was on impulse, as I was rather upset. Argh, I need to control my emotions, why do I let them get the better of me, and dominate me?! Weakling ):
Resolution: I shall not be rash, and impulsive anymore! working my way to becoming a good girl!

My sister sucks, she told me about that she wanted me to be her accompanist the day before her competition. I was like, flabbergasted?! Totally shocked into silence. The competition went badly (obviously) . As if to compound the problem, and further emphasize the many things that went wrong that day, the competition clashed with sze's lesson, and I had to change it. He was so pissed off. Ugh. I swear, I will NEVER do this type of last minute stuff ever again.

Frustrated with everything that's going on right now. Nevermind, tomorrow will be a brighter day! PIANO FTW :D

I think O level chinese oral will prove to be fun on thurs heh heh, I can't wait for it either (:

ANNE MARIA DONT BE SAD OKAY, you're awesome and definitely worthy of the title of level co. Continue to jy, the post will definitely have its ups and downs ! Dont give up just cuz of a setback! You can do it!
Next year, I will cheer for you when you run okay! Screw this year's red house people whom didn't allow you to join!
Hope you ankle recovers soon! ILY <3 <3

okay gotta go :D cya! tata! (:

When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. I shall prove to everyone that I'm tough and capable of achieving :D

2010-07-01T06:28:00.001-07:00

Halt. Before you read further, lemme explain why my blog bombarded with emo posts everywhere, from top to bottom.. I only blog whenever I'm down, or sad, or unhappy etc . Whatever, you get the idea right.

So, if you dislike the content of my blog, please, scram. Create your own journal, and bitch there {: I don't really give a damn to what you think of me, so keep your opnions to yourself yeah.

I doubt you will ever ever ever read this blog. But who cares. Since the start, I already knew I aint important to you anyways, not when you have other *coughs* interests. Yeah, I'm not sure what to do with the friendship we have now. Tell me what to do. Dictate it, at least it would be as heart-wrenching as it is for me now. ;_; I never doubted it. BUT as I retrace my steps, and took a look at the ramifications of what is left of our friendship, I realised how foolish and naive I was to force myself to believe things that I never were a fairytale right from the very beginning.

You really aren't what you seem. Nobody knows how bitchy you can get. I dont even know what I mean to you.

Dont get me wrong. This post isn't about scolding you. I'm just expressing myself, and letting out the emotional struggle welling inside me. I'm just. sad. disappointed. That we, no matter how I fought to believe otherwise, were NEVER true friends...

=====================================================================================

first day of school was not awesome at all ):

teehee, my favourite word. DIE

2010-06-27T05:02:00.000-07:00

hey!

just watched barbie~ haha, call it childish if you like, but it exemplifies moral values such as loyalty, truth, and courage. With movies promoting violence, betrayal and hatred nowadays, its little wonder I still stick to Barbie LOL.

Last day of holidays. NOT looking forward to tomorrow.

2010-06-20T23:35:00.000-07:00

WHOOHOO I AM BACKKKKK FROM JAPAN :D

awesome much <3 i lovelove the rural parts of japan! shall post pictures of it someday =)

lala okay i needa go bathe :D

BYEBYE !

2010-06-06T23:13:00.000-07:00

HEYY awesomez peepo.
I'm loving holidays. I sound like some Macs slogan, I'm lovin it. hahaa.

Happy belated birthday dear cara! {: love you loads darlingz!

ytd i went out with my family, and went to swensen's, as my maid is leaving singapore this coming sunday for good. D:

Her husband divorced her, and she needs to go back to settle some problems. ): i'll miss you Ratih, and all the best in everything you do! <3

here are some random photos:--

okay tata~~ :D till next time!

2010-06-06T22:29:00.000-07:00

it was just, a fling, but i really dont regret a thing .

2010-06-02T06:47:00.000-07:00

MM HIII~

MEP Camp was fun today!

Early in the morning!
I waited for Calista~ Couldnt get through her phone line. When we finally managed to contact her house line, we realised that she just woke up. o.o cal told us to drive off first.
In the car. me and amy crapppp about the sky and the earth :D

At ACSI!
We reached there on time! But. We lost our way. So we walked in circles! (literally) Finally some dunman girls came, and we followed them! (heehee thank the lucky stars, they are our saviours~ )

Briefing!
Oh no. I'm not in the same group as Valerie ): sobs. -annoyed with everything-

" Hi, what's your name? "
" Yi Rui. "
*looks up, breaks out of daydream*
" I got nice and long fingers. "
" oh yeah, mine's longer than yours! "

Ridiculous la, crazy kor~

Okay, then we broke into our groups!
I met some new people! Let me see whether I can rmbr them : :
- Sophia ( TKGS )
- DEBBIE ( TKGS )
- Sabrina ( RGS )
- Ryan Neo ( RI )
- Hu Siyu ( RI )
- Tin Long ( ACSI )
- Barnabas (ACSI )
- Wisu ( ACSI )
- Li Ying ( MGS )
- Anna Lisa( MGS)
- Beverly (Dunman)
-Bing Long (Dunman)
- Rane, Juni, Cal ;D ( SNGS )

uh oh.
aiya
not bad la :D

haha okay, after the icebreaker, where we made up absurd names for ourselves, we went for singing session~! i tell you it was awesome man!

lalalalala~
-teabreak- I didnt eat, was trying to diet, so I ran here and there and here and there! and i whacked yirui(must whack somemore times. meano ): )!
and then we went for dance class! graham's dancing is hilarious! oh SO IS SHIMIN'S. WAHA. I was laughing until I nearly cried, poor yishuen thought I was mad( which, well, yeah, I am. )

hmm, then. lunch. i ran here and there and here and there (again.) I didnt take loads of pics with shuen shuen D: D: D: -gah- okay i will take tmr! ^^

group discussion was the highlight of today! siyu was super funny. we thought of the idea of changing the gender. oh gosh. it's gonna be epic tmr lol.

after that we had a lecture! the lady was AWESOME. and i mean awesome! Her vocals are like. WOW.
I was spazzing with yirui! He doesnt want to high with me ): that baddie. jocelyn stole his bag, then 我好不容易take his bag back for him :D and we were doing the chily cheer!

I was so.bored. during the lecture. I mean, okay, yeah, I DO appreciate the Dim Sum Dollies and all, but ahhh. I just. cant stand sitting there. I will get restless.
So I talked to Lianne, Jo, and kor, and I wrote a post it to Lianne, Jocelyn and 2 post its to kor~ (He made me write one about ___ ._. )

I should stop being so spoiled. People put in tremendous effort to organise all these talksfor us, so I should really pay attention and not their efforts and precious time away... Tmr, I swear that I will pay attention to every single thing the instructor say!

Amanda shall be a good girl! :D

After the camp, went to 313 and shopped with Melissa, Kim San, Yan Shan, Clarissa, and Joanna! Gilly went too, but she left halfway to go out with her friend ^^ Bought a plain long sleeve tshirt for $9! I think it's really pretty! :D hehe yay!

Ohohoh. Meli asked me whether me and yirui are siblings. speechless ._. she said we look alike?!

... how i wish it really was the case. I want an older bro who will take care of me, not some younger sister who annoys the hell outta me DDDD:

Tired. Back pain. Butt pain. Leg pain. Brain pain. I'm becoming a tofu D: I shall go sleep soon!!!

teehee, that concludes my day! today was really awesome!!!!!

looking forward to tmr~~ cyaaa <333333

p.s. THANK YOU DEAR CALISTA for all the toilet trips and for helping me find my camera! I know I am a very mafan person ): sorry, and ily <3

2010-05-30T00:14:00.000-07:00

I dont get it. I have a perfect (okay no so perfect, but still, good enough) life. Intact family, average grades, and awesome life, but this sense of helplessness in me, this apathy in me.

Maybe I outta get a life and quit bitching.

Nuh uh, life aint perfect. It never was.

Fairygodmothers are just make-believe, created by weaklings, so as to give little children strength and tide them through till they are adults. Oh please. Humanity is fucking cruel. It devastates me to see how intelligent species like us can fight and bitch against one another.

From minute arguments. To whopping fights.

Between friends. Within the country. Between countries. WAR. Dont you think this is absurd? How low many politicans sink to, in order to satisfy their wants and craves?

Even animals dont do that. Even animals protect their own species.

oh yes, be skeptical. I seriously doubt that humans are intelligent, or in any way superior to the animal kingdom.

You claim to put on a facade. Oh please, anyone can see through it. It's frail, weak, fragile, just a reflection of what you really are inside. If you need comfort, say so. Dont behave like a bitch and go around badmouthing others. Dont give me that crap that you didnt badmouth me.

Oh my gosh. I must have been muddle headed then, to even believe or take in a single word that you uttered. Wow. When I was busy thinking of how to cheer you up, you were busy laughing at me behind my back. No1's ever perfect, and you are trying to be like nobody. It's really narcissistic of you, really, to believe you can do things that are way beyond your limits.

You talk about betrayal, and about lies. Hah, what DO you really know about them, may I ask? It's just another of your rantings. You dont know what it is like, to really have your friend to betray you. What you experience is just a weak imitation of real bullying and betrayal. Nopes, you dont have the capacity to even swallow a trivial insult, let alone bombardments of insults hurling at you. Imagine it.

Yeah, you have been forsaken. so what. It's not like I've never gone through the same thing as you. Quit acting like your entire world is crumbling apart, it really disgusts me to the core of my being.

Aww, you poor thing. I pity you, and your goddamn lies. Stop whining and acting like a pathetic fool, and maybe I'll decide to take pity on you and help you grasp the explicit meaning of the word "trust" . Uh huh, you cant even comprehend that yet. Dont even talk about understanding the implicit meaning of it, dear.

To put it succinctly, you need a reality check. Big time >D

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

PPR SUCKS. why is the EC cohort improving while im hopelessly deproving. Greatt. The worst PPR in my life. I better buck up. :D

I'm looking forward to june hols!

MEP CAMP!
GOING SHOPPING WITH YANSHAN, SONIA, JOANNA, ANGELA AND AND MELISSA! <3
EXTENDED LESSONS :X
CHINESE MOCK EXAM D:
STRINGS CAMP! ^^
JAPAN! :D
OUTING WITH NICK AND CARA!
OUTING WITH EMERALDIANS(I HOPE)!
BERNICE COMING TO MY HOUSE! (:
OUTING WITH MY COUSINS :B
WATCHING CONCERT WITH VALERIE! <3 :D

gosh, my hols are alr packed. o.o amanda, you better start on your gigantic pile of hw and projects :XX you must survive term 3. you can do it!!! :D

2010-05-14T06:24:00.000-07:00

All that I stood for, crumbled right in my face. The deep-rooted advocations. The heartfelt professions. All, gone.

I realised that I could never live a normal life, without you by my side. It was just pretentious of me to decieve myself into believing that I could. Even after months of avoiding you, just a conversation with you online draws the raw feelings back into the core of my soul. Why, why are you able to penetrate into the bottomless depths of my heart so easily? Why am I so vulnerable against you, despite trying to fend for and protect myself?

Failure, that's what I am.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hypocricy in its art form, that's what I've perfected it to. Wow, seeing myself laugh like no one's business when honestly, im boiling inside. Why, why, why?

okay today is a depressing day, byebye.

my term 2's ppr is so screwed.

napfa test rocked :D

i miss angela!

valerie is awesome <3

2010-04-24T05:33:00.001-07:00

I realise. That if i let go, I will be happy. I'm going to forget all about the betrayal, the hate, the unhappiness, the tears. All I'm going to remember of you is your smile, your voice, and all the memories you left for me to pick. I understand that I will never, ever, ever talk to you again, and rewind those times in which were one of the happiest times of my life, but I will still cling on to these memories and hope.

I sincerely hope that one day. One day. That those fragmented memories I have of you would be forgotten. When that day arrives. I think of you, and those thoughts would be void of emotion. Yes. When that day comes, I will truly be free. Free. From you. And all the hurt and agony you thrusted to me.

Reminisince. The past, the present, and the future.

The game of chess. I stand there, helplessly, as I contemplate my next move while watching you devour my queen. The most powerful and precious weapon of the chess set. The last tool I was left to maneuver with.
Desparity overwhelms me, slapping me in the face. There's nothing I can do about it. Not now. This game is lost, it's over. Defeat. And triumph. Hope. And bereft of it. Smiles. And tears. 这俩天渊之别的感情。你永不理解的。

俗语说：一份耕耘，一份收获。我为何为你付出这么多？这虽对朋友们匪夷所思，但我却坚信你总有一天会醒悟。我。这个天资的小孩。

学而时习之，不亦乐乎？我的学业渐渐地退步。。唉！我这个傻丫头，必定死去算了。

担忧。。遗憾。。昀珊，你必须过这一关。一天。总有一天，我会得到我说欲望的自由。那，那一天领来时，我就会找到我的立足点。

p.s. im done here. done believing. I was naive once. But not anymore.

2010-03-30T07:38:00.000-07:00

Oh man, cruel temptation ended! As I watch Aili and Qiaobin drown in the sea, my already contorted heart broke into a billion pieces. My heart really goes climbing to them. Despite all the despicable sins that they did, they truly and really loved Ninuo.

爱。我们宸居在这繁忙的世界里，早已心麻木了，“沮丧”这两个字是我时代的象征。我们这自我为生的时代能体会温暖与爱情吗？

A taste of my horrendous chinese. LOL. Bernice's english rocks. wayyy better than mine! :D

a neverending cycle of events, painfully repeating itself. Round and round the clock goes. It's 12am again, school's starting in 7 hours. When can I break free from this vicious cycle of tireness and convulsive dread? Oh when?

p.s., you are welcome Jasmine! Anytime. ^^

dont worry valerie you will do fine fine fine <3 dist dear <3

2010-03-26T06:58:00.000-07:00

Today is friday! It's the last day of the ardous week 1. why are holidays ending just? it just fleets past me.

I'm trying to believe you. I really am.

Cca today was horrible, cuz i had stomachache and I felt like vomiting._.

okay byebye. i just changed my blogskin. my father is so annoying. grr im angry. D:

2010-02-02T06:25:00.001-08:00

HIIII.

I feel degraded. There is an English pro reading this blog D: roarrr.

CNY is coming. I cant believe it. The year gushed by, smacking me right flat on the face, giving a huge blow to it. 2009 is gone, 2010 is here. Why am I still clinging on to the memories? Forget about them. January, the ever loving baby month of the year, has zoomed straight past like a Ferrari <3 And now, it's Feb. The month of love, check-ups ( :/ ) , and ang paos! Amanda Chua, can you please stop slacking. 1 entire month has gone by, and you dont even know what you are doing.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

today i went for the chinese music composition workshop. couldnt concentrate AT ALL. damn it...

Why did I behave like a foolish idiot?
Why am I such a freak as to not have control over my emotions?
Why did she have such a daunting effect on me?

I cowered in fear, avoiding eye contact at all costs. Whoops. An accident. The innocent flicker of an eye. Those blood-shot eyes were boring right into me, as if seeing through my filmsy, naked soul. I shut my eyes, trying to descipher what was with that Hell-like experience. In that moment, it all seemed to make sense. Hell was my life-long partner, seducing and torturing me to the depths of beyond descriptive words. He would lurk around, stashing hate into me with his all-too-silky voice, piling them up one by one, like stacks of paper. He, out of all people, could bring out the demon in me, the veritable demon which was lethal and poisonous, so poisonous that a touch could kill within seconds. Every stare, every glance, every breath he took could send me reeling back in convulsion. His booming laughter fills the room, causing my body to stiffen in uneasiness and tension. I gazed at him, the slim, too-thin guy donned in white clothing.

Disappointment, hurt, anger, hatred. Everything churned inside the fibre of my being. I despise him, every single part of him, even to a single chromatin thread of his genes. Shane, I detest you for having that effect on me. I utterly do.

2010-01-20T06:34:00.001-08:00

I stared at her in utter contempt. "Francis", my voice was thick with blatant scorn, "only little children cry."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
bloody baron of Slytherin, I o rise up to ye!

yay, idiosyncrisis. I am going insane, looney, mentally challenged! bwahahaha yay
i love 3- hope. <3 hope I will be happy forever and be shielded from all the worries in life. but frankly, that ain't gonna be the case. [:

Chopin Etude in C minor, Op. 10 no. 12, " Revolutionary" . That's what my life feels like. My blog, my words. oops, broke curfew again. cya (:

penned at 10.39pm <3 , rainnyyy :D

i love the rain i love the rain,
it is so forlorn and bitten
with skies as black as charcoal and
raindrops as large as pearls.

Oh rain, oh rain, how I love the rain!

( perhaps I will set this to a song one day HAHAHAHA. word painting~~ ) :DDDD

okay i will REALLY stop now. BYE.

I mean really. okay im being lame. B.Y.E. AND GDNIGHT FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS <3

2009-12-23T06:10:00.000-08:00

YESTERDAY.
Rhrsl for sec 1 orientation.
very pissed with some ppl zzz.
):
it was boring.
went for pepper lunch with jasmine. no money alr.
yay! supposed to go with may, then she pangseh us )):
it was fun fun fun! as usual heh :D
crapped alot.
I really feel much happier around friends man.
Oh well.
Whatever la.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

TODAY .
o.o sec 1 orientation performance.
it was okay la. very very soft, according to my mum. should have more ppl =o.
ms chan lied.
she said that the sec 1s made the right choice to go to st nicks.
pi la.
after that, I went out with nicholas and cara.
Met at kallang leisure. Never go before, so I got lost.
Then, I asked people where kallang leisure park is when it is right in front of me. Sia la they keep laughing at me ): I very paiseh zzz ):
Watched ninja and assassins and went iceskating~~~
iceskating ftw!
nick suck la -,-
it was an awesome awesome awesome day!
i saw many pretty things hahahah!
then, on the way home, we took the bus going to the wrong direction and waste half and hour for nothing. sia la. :/
one of the only days when I'm really really happpyyy!
yayy, thanks loads guys (:
cant wait to go out with both of you again heh :D

p.s. what about tmr, or the next day? It's never going to end you liar liar liar. selfish pig. I dont want to believe you anymore. stop lying. its not working.

2009-12-18T04:27:00.000-08:00

AHAAHA, my 100th post! Congratulations to me, I am so awesome. :DD

Today was fun, I went out with angela. [:
Watched avatar. The graphics are awesome! I feel like I'm travelling an unknown world, a fantasy world, where the plants and animals are so exotic and beautiful :D
Oh well. Must come back to reality. Holidays are coming to an end ! ;oo !! I haven't started on my stupid chinese hw. I better get moving man. D: NOOOO.

I cant believe it la. I am going to be a sec 3!!! DDD: In no time, o levels will zoom to my doorstep. Freak. I'm scared la. -.-

Wishing everyone a merry christmas and a happy new year! (: All the best in everything you do!! =DD

I just realised it was never, really over. I lied to myself. Again. Me and my deceptive nature. =.=

2009-12-15T06:00:00.000-08:00

Today has been a great day. Went to may's house for sectionals. Talked to jasmine about piano and viola. I really hope to be a world renowned piano prof one day. If this fails, backup: zookeeper (: I am so awesome! I love me[: (look at this may: I AM THE AWESOME OF ALL <3 ) I will post our crazy pics one day yeah yayyyy!

Thanks for the bdae present ppl! and jasmine for the bdae card! <333

2009-12-03T05:18:00.001-08:00

I am finally 14!!!!!!!!!! :DDDDDDDDDDDD YAYYY (:

2009-11-24T05:54:00.000-08:00

I looked up from the corner of my eye, catching the last fragment of you disappearing right before my very eyes. Into the midst of chaos. Of confusion. You turn back, and throw something at me before nonchalantly walking away. I desperately try to grasp on to the last bit of hope you left there. It shimmered in the cascading full moon. So…. beautiful. Mesmerizing. Words were not enough to describe its captivating beauty. Blinking back tears, I struggled and fought the fierce battle with this tiny shard that I thought was everything I lived for.

I relived everything, reminsiniscing the priceless times spend with you. I felt the stab of pain, piercing long and thoroughly through my heart when I saw that icy smile you gave. The warmth of it all is usurped by a new darkness that I couldn't quite place my finger on. You are a terror now. A possessed monster in the same body. Still the pale, slim, short auburn, fiery hair, and oh, those crisp, hazel-brown eyes and small perfect lips smiling at me. The smile did not reach up to your eyes and glint there. I was appalled. When had the ghostly side taken over you?!

Suddenly, the truth of it all dawned on me. I finally understood my role in your life. A mere human being, not worth mentioning, not worth a second thought. With my last ounce of strength, I let go of that hope. It gleefully fleeted away, elated that it didn't have to put up much of a fight before winning that battle. It's all over. Resignation engulfed my entire body, it hurt so much that I yelped out loud. I thought we would lead a life of blissfulness together, a life where I could be immature and carefree, just as I used to be. Oh, how naive I was.

Biting back what was left of my pride, I staggered and left your coven. You just stare at me without any demeanor, slightly amused at my "antics" to try to make you revert to your usual self. You smile that smile again. I turn away, utterly disgusted and revolted by that very being staring at me. I left the dilapidated cave, that secret hideout and coven of yours. The one that I knew has passed away. What's left is an evil incarnation.

This.. is Change. The drastic twists and devoid turns it makes, turning you into a inexplicible demon. I heaved a huge sigh and let go of whatever memory I had of you. You are gone. Forever.

The wheel turns and turns.

p.s. its not to ANYONE at all, :D ! I just like writing emo stuff.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

YAYY, I havent written compos in ages. I can't wait to go back to school man! To study, not for some blah blah sports day =.= zzz. I dont wanna wake up tmr DDD:

sobs. D: i posted. byebye D: gdnight fellow human beings ! :D

2009-11-14T06:33:00.000-08:00

i have removed ppl from my permissions list. yay. :D

2009-11-11T02:30:00.000-08:00

today i had cip! hehe, it was very fun!
I had it at Anchor Green Primary School.

I woke up at about 6plus in the morning, hehe, I nearly died of exhuastion. Then met iso at bishan and had macs breakfast. tsktsk, some WOMAN I know took approx 20 mins to drink a cup of tea! HAHAHA so funny la. :D

Then we went to sengkang, and then changed lrt to tongkang to meet amanda foo and xinjing! ah hah they got lost too, if not they didnt, we will have to pay to the amanda foo fund ): The Amanda Foo fund owes us $10 each lor, havent pay us back yet.

okay anyway, when we reach the school, the cip woman havent even come yet == so lame la, make me rush like some mad woman.

we volunteered for the restroom association and played games with the children to raise more awareness of the environment. the kids . mixed feelings. some were very cute, but others were so scary! I am officially scared of little children D: ! Then me and iso took pics in the toilet! I think our pics are so awesome and original lor! We are the awesome-st people on earth EVER. :DD Then later on, we were like so despo to give away the badges to anyone we see AHAHHA(:

It was quite fun! But very tiring! Today was an awesome day yay!!! Happy meeeee(:

2009-11-10T04:39:00.000-08:00

You have changed. It's scary to see the way you are now. I don't know you anymore. Please, go back to your old self. I miss you.

2009-10-31T08:16:00.000-07:00

i live in an awesome world.
i live an awesome life.
i have an awesome family.
i have awesome friends.
~~i have an awesome brain.~~ NOT.

yay. In conclusion, I am awesome.

:D

yiqi, have fun in china kayy! I'll miss you! Must come back to celebrate my bdae with me! :DD YAY.

jasmine, dont kill me D: I will tell you beforehand next time okay! i love you :DD

somehow i dont like to blog these days. No fun D: byebye

2009-10-27T20:41:00.000-07:00

can you all stop insulting kimi. rahhhh.

check ups soon. byebye. D:

2009-10-21T06:47:00.001-07:00

disappointed.

one word, yet conveying so much emotions. The thoughts, the struggles. The hatred. How could you say that and make me cry. Do you know how hurting it feels? I hate you.

I dont care whether this considered a post or not. I'm not going to bother. I suck.

Bye.

2009-10-19T07:20:00.000-07:00

Hi peepo.
today i went to kbox with shan, sonia, angela, grace and joanna!
it was very very fun!
i was late for piano lesson *congratulates self*
yay.

eoys are over. i cant believe i finally crossed the last lap, the last hurdle! now all im left to do is wait for the results, and pray, hope for the best :D yeahhh.

wednesday D:

ohoh, HAPPY BELATED 30TH BIRTHDAY KIMI!!! <33333333333 17TH OCTOBER 1979! ILYILYILYILY! :DDDDD

i stayed up on 17th oct and 18th oct to watch f1 D: very tired now. zz. D: i shall go sleep soon.

is this considered a post? i know it is :D yay, byebye earthlings.

i am awesome-ly awesome. :D

2009-10-14T07:18:00.000-07:00

eoys are finally over! im very happy! yay! :D now all i can do is hope, hope that i can do well :D

yay !

may i posted! comment now!

yay

jasmine i am awesome! you are awesome too! let's be awesome together! i love you!

yay

okay done being happy!

bye humans :D

2009-09-16T00:42:00.000-07:00

sorry isobel! ):

2009-09-14T01:08:00.000-07:00

Today I went to AMK Hub after school! Whoohoo section outing again! They drank bubble tea ( with lots of pearls *eek* ) and I bought ice cream to eat! Then Sonia, Yung Ci and Grace the sotong left D: And then me, iso, and jas went to AMK Hub whoohoo! Went to NTUC to buy sushi :D bwahahaa im broke now ):

Then on the way up, we saw this stupid man, and he almost whacked iso’s face. Crazy one la. I don’t know why I keep seeing crazy men with iso and jasmine. =/

Haha, we went to level 2 to sit down and eat! And then this very nice man he gave up the seat for us to sit! Whoohoo I feel guilty now la =X

We made a conclusion: We are awesome! Whoohoo and we are the best triplets ever around! Yay yay yay! :DDD

2009-09-12T07:53:00.000-07:00

whee! viola exam is over! i screwed screwed screwed screwed it up! YAYYY ((: hope for the best. jiayou is so going to fire me ):
im sad. DD:

now. EOY and mep practical. jiayou me! it's the last lap. amanda you can do it :D I believe in myself! All the wayyyyy~~ :DDD ! I can and will get my 70% overall! HAHH :DDD wheeee!

ytd, went to amk hub with jasmine whoohoo! it was fun fun fun! jasmine insulted me, then i didnt want to talk to her anymore, but after one minute (or less), I gave up my resolve and started talking to her again. Just what she predicted. WAHAHAHA ): sad my will power is like, 0. DD: haha, but yay, ytd was fun fun fun! i also enjoyed the indian temple of the fine arts workshop heh :D

wed was awesome :D i liked the dinner, at some restaurant near dhoby ghaut whee :D Sze gave me this mock exam and I got 129 DD: which is like, horrible. ): sigh. I hope I get a distinction for exam. It probably wont happen cus I screwed it up. I broke down in one of the pieces!(cause the accompanist dropped the book -.- ) and I also played 2 scales wrongly D:

This is just great, Amanda Chua. Stupid girl -.-

Whats over is over. Shall look forward instead of lamenting over whats happened. I already tried my best, no regrets (: sze fire me then i shall go and look for a new teacher haha.

Sze's gonna be gone for 6 weeks, in Africa, to spend his time with the lions. HAHA. Hope the lions dont eat him up, I still want my exam result back, good anot. LOL.

I love you Isobel, Jasmine, May and Yi Xuan :D YAY we are awesome! We did it after dont know how longggg of practices! Viola exam is overrrrr!!!! Oh and nice one, Ren Hao, though I doubt you will ever read this. The accompanist said your pieces were very well done. Good for you (:

shall post more next time! byeeee~ :D

2009-09-08T07:07:00.000-07:00

3 more days. jiayou :DD
iso =o what happened? =oo

2009-09-03T03:19:00.001-07:00

Sometimes when I look at people, I see a mirror of myself from the way they behave and act. When people are despo, I see the way I used to behave to **** . It’s freaking weird that I despise this behaviour when in actual fact, I do it myself too.. I don’t understand it. -.- Eeekk..

I am sad. I did badly for ppr. I did badly for chem test. I did badly for math test. Why not just say I’m destined to fail. I totally am. Yeah I totally am. Freak. What did I promise my mother? At least an A2 percentage? Now she will just go on with my lying crap. I’m sick and tired of this life. Seriously…

Blah. Sorry jasmine, I’m not in the mood to post. I will post more next time okay? Cya.

2009-08-31T07:49:00.000-07:00

today was fun!
happy teacher's day!!!
for assembly there was don't forget the lyrics! whoohoo it was damn fun :DDD some teachers actually sang quite well! sonia was complaining on my unenthu-ness D:
english compre test was .. okay i guess.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
after school i wanted to go home and be a guai kia and practice piano. note: wanted to.
obviously. due to my lack of discipline, i failed. -.- cus so many ppl were tempting me to go back to rosyth.
haha, i saw loads of 6-adventurous people. isaac actually looks.... omg. I shan't say it. stupid. and eugenia looks different! in a good way! and yize's so tall omg D:
met up with nicholas, cara, mei an and lingli and went to hougang mall together. haha, stupid nickywawa, grow so much DDD:
window shopped.
while we were about to go home, we saw this really retarded guy. talking to himself. then cara pointed him out to me and I looked in his direction. wrong move man. -.- he noticed us and ran towards us, particularly me and cara. D:

Nicholas Chong, you didn't save us you evil! D:

And then we walked quickly and out of sight, into the mrt station. We thought the stupid guy episode was over. Next thing we knew, he was running towards us again. Somemore he came so freaking near me and cara! OMG. We just walked quickly away. ): It's a freaky day. Isobel!! This guy is alot more freaky than the shhh guy! Seriously he went so close he could have hugged me! DDD: ewwwww.

after that, we finally ( after pulling the others down to accompany us back to the mrt station) went different routes :D

i went for my piano lesson after that.

yay, i didn't regret going back to rosyth! whoohoo! =DDD

countdown: 12 more days! jiayou! :/

2009-08-21T07:26:00.000-07:00

I'm miraculously weird. After one hour of creating blogskins, im back to the old one. WITH NO CHANGES -.- LOLLL. lameeshyt. :D

school this week was okay. as usual. my FIRST EVER single digit for mep! whoohoooo!! :DDD im an AWESOMEE record breaker! everything i do is awesome! yay yay =D okay done.

:DDD <3 okay. im too happy for my own good. im just faking it. whatever. i dont know what im saying anymore. bye ): saddd.

hahaaha. drastic mood swings within a few minutes. :D

2009-08-08T00:49:00.000-07:00

-deleted- cus its not right :D

but i still dislike you. i will try to like you since we will have to (urgh) go through syf together. =/ heh. YAY. no. YAY. no. YAY. no. YAY. no. YAY.

end of post.

*dies of exhaustion*

2009-08-07T20:29:00.000-07:00

ytd was national day celebration! yayyy! loads of singing. :D gil was playing with my phone all the time haha.

then we went for lunch at j8. at mos burgers :D .

then me and xinjing went to plaza sing to watch UP. YAY! It's nice! But very tiring cause the "smart" us chose first rows seats. suffered from neckache haha. (: took neoprints. and and and , i saw sharshar bear at dhoby ghaut mrt station! :D

okayy, anyway, ytd was a great day. sorry this post is so horrible la lol. i cant think of anything else but viola lesson now. gtg prac. bye =)

2009-08-06T05:39:00.000-07:00

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SINGAPORE IN ADVANCE! WHEE, :D

2009-08-01T07:31:00.001-07:00

I HATE PEOPLE . I AM A SADIST .

___ always says that my blog is sometimes too happy for me. Haha. Maybe.. I guess.

Gratz to all who are in new exco ! :D YAYYY! =D

will post more next time, ( when im not so lazy ) :D bye!

p.s. im not posting about you. stop thinking that i am and say that i spread stories. continue hurting me la. there's not much more of me to hurt alr anyway....

2009-08-01T07:08:00.000-07:00

sec 4 farewell. im really gonna miss you all. D:

2009-07-25T03:06:00.000-07:00

Are you a sadist? Why do you enjoy seeing people get upset over your comments? I just can't stand you anymore. You haven't changed one bit. Hopeless.

MEP concert was rather fun! :DDDD I liked the ensemble and violin solo! It's not cus of ben lee. As in, he plays very very well, but I don't think he's hot. Cute la :DDD hahaa.

I think I'm so going to fail gong han. Gratz to me :D haish.

yay jasmine i posted again? Aren't you proud of me?

2009-07-20T04:24:00.000-07:00

I really don't get you. What are you trying to say, after beating around the bush for so long....

TMR THERE'S STRINGS :DDDD ! Oh yeah, FINALLY (: (: *laughs* YAY YAY YAY YAY OMGG! YAY :DDDDD oh im not sure whether there's still sze lesson. =/ ahh well. i shall call him tmr! xD

Today was fun! Back to school after one week of slacking. (: yay! during gym, i was like, shocked with myself. i can actually do cartwheel! I thought I can't do anymore, cuz I didn't prac. Hahaha, yay! But my legs hurt like crazy after that =/ HAHA, and angela was chionging math! I'm so shocked lor. Since WHEN did she not do math homework in school?! Oh well. She's smart, have to give it to her. :D I can't finish math homework in time if i never do at home.

Yay, looking forward to school tmr! STRINGS <3 !

P.S. Stop it. You are not a true friend. at all. Why do you keep lying to me? I hate you.

2009-07-12T07:28:00.000-07:00

thanks for everyone who wished for me to get well soon (: thank you thank you!

2009-07-10T06:43:00.000-07:00

GRAHAM CHUA! ( im so used to typing this now) The very random person. :DD to the other people, urm, dont read la. :D

I shall dedicate this post to you. Thank you so much for listening to me! Some stuff might be abit offensive/sensitive, sorry if you mind, though i know you probably don't. You rock! You try to help me whenever you can, even though you don't really know me well. I really appreciate everything- your advice and a listening ear! Thank you thank you thank you! I am really really glad that I talked to you on your birthday, you random guy! Heh (:

Oh and and and, I shall TRY to boost my own ego. Try only. ~~Might not work.~~ Whoops, I'm supposed to have higher self esteem. Yay, I can do it! ((:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yes! HE is not online today. ~~Why am I happy again? ....~~

2009-07-08T01:36:00.000-07:00

I think Ms Tey is a weirdo. To put people who have MAJOR character clashes together. Oh well.. It's her choice. And I respect it. May Chan, are you disappointed? Heh. (:

Life's a climb. I will walk this journey, no matter how tough it gets. As the saying goes, " when the going gets tough, the tough gets going." I believe I CAN do it. Screw people who bitch. Screw people who are two sided. I CAN do it, I CAN find my true friends, I CAN study hard and concentrate on my studies. I have faith in myself. I don't need to rely on people to tell me things I want to hear, that I can. I KNOW I can. I was wrong once, and I regretted it. I'm not going to let myself down again. I know who I can trust, and who I can't. Who are true and who are not. I don't need people to scold me, and tell me to think for myself what I have done wrong.

I know I'm kind of a bitch at times, I'm trying to change that. No1 can be perfect right. Everyone has their own imperfections and flaws. Jiayou me!

2nd week of school. I lost my rubber band for the braces! =/ haiz. i shall go get somemore i guess. Pay for my own mistakes. Stupid me. D; Amanda Chua, you are so smart, always losing stuff huh. LOL. I'm soliloquing(whatever the sp is). yayyy. (:

p.s. I'm going to lock this blog. I don't like people I don't really know/like to read it and know what's going on with my life. :DD

2009-07-05T19:45:00.000-07:00

today got sze lesson. yay awesome. (:

2009-07-01T06:46:00.000-07:00

wadever. just let nature take its course. wadever, wadever, wadever. bio test. jiayou.

by the way, thanks yiqi for buying me the bread and staying up to write that note. Thankewww!! Loveee you lots! <3333

-DELETED.-

~~Am I living for myself, or for others? I keep asking myself that question....~~

2009-07-01T04:02:00.000-07:00

first two days of school was rather fun ((: oh well.

jocelyn: teacher may i go to toilet?

paul na: -ignores-

jocelyn: teacher may i go to toilet?

paul na: -looks at jocelyn, turns back without saying anything-

jocelyn: teacher! may i go to toilet?!

paul na: oh toilet ah! okay. I thought she said something like the particles are tired.

LOL la. The whole class erupted into laughter. HAHAAHA!

then after that.

Angela: Teacher, can we use that word, 'boing' in the test?

Paul na: what boing?

angela: *points*

paul na: that is BEING la!

*whole class laughs again* HAHAAHAHA! I really enjoyed chem lesson! It was really interesting man! First ever successful science lesson that didnt make me sleep! =ooo

oh well. friend. friend. friend. friend. jiayou me.

p.s. nobody is perfect. stop trying to change me, i intend to stay just the way I am.

2009-06-30T02:29:00.001-07:00

-DELETED-

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Others dont read la. Shoo! :D
SJB!! <3

Thanks for everything! I will really think it through myself! Yeah, just TRYY to support me okay! :DDD hahaaah! I love you loads! Thanks for changing me in many ways! It's my life, I will try my best to live it with no regrets. You are really really nice, smart and pretty!!! dont have so low self esteem okay! LOVE YOU LOTS AND LOTS! I alr said all to you at school, dont need to say so much la! :D

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Isobel! <3

Thanks for encouraging me to do whatever I want. You are the funniest and craziest desk partner ever! LOVE YOU MY AWESOME BOOB! <33 wheeee!! thanks for everything again!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
yiqi! <3

Thanks for everything! Love you! for listening to everything, and also to support me in whatever I do. Thanks! (: I really appreciate it!

still thinking... wondering... slap me back into reality.

2009-06-25T06:49:00.000-07:00

whee! LAST DAY OF CIP!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY FINALLY! now BACK TO WORK! CHIONGGG AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-22T20:50:00.000-07:00

All of the 14 person must do this quiz , unless (s)he does'nt have a blog .Write the names of 14 people you can think off the top of your head , then answer the question .
01. jasmine lee
02. ren hao
03. chen yiqi
04. denise lee
05. mei an
06. sharmaine wong
07. sharlene!
08. amanda foo
09. may loh
10. ellen chua
11. yan shan
12. cara
13. nicholas chong
14. amanda lee
1.How did you meet 7 ?
{sharlene} haha, she's my COUSIN! <3333

02. What will you do if you and 13 never met ?
{nicholas chong} LOL, nothing.

03. What will you do if 1 & 12 date ?
{jasmine and cara} LOL! no la, they dont even know each other. Besides, they arent les. :D

04. have you ever seen 14 cry
{amanda lee} no.

05. would 4 & 11 be a good couple ?
{denise and yan shan} NO!

06. Do you think 11 is attractive ?
{Yan Shan} YES, damn bling bling and sexy man! woots! :DDDD

07. What is 2's favourite colours ?
{Ren Hao} blue! i think... =/

08. What was the last time you talk to 9 ?
{may loh} yesterday. and we fought. yay.

09. What language does 8 speaks ?
{amanda foo} english and chinese. nothing else right? =o

10. Who is 13 going out with ?
{nicholas chong} Thats what i will like to know. eh nickywawa, who you like ah?

11. What grade is 12 in ?
{cara} same age as me. sec 2. :D

12. Would you ever date 10 ?
{Ellen Chua} OF COURSE NOT, SHE'S MY SISTER -.-

13. Where does 5 live ?
{mei an} somewhere quite near rosyth? =o

14. What's the best thing about 3 ?
{yiqi} she listens to all my problems and help me when im in need. yay yiqi! (:

15. What would you want to tell 10 ?
{Ellen} GO AND STUDYYY!!!!

16. What's the best thing about 8 ?
{Amanda foo} she rocks! she is a very nice girl! :DDD i love foo!!! =DD

17. Have you ever kissed 5 ?
{mei an} NO, lol.

18. What's the best memory of you with 7 ?
{sharlene} since we were young! lots and lots of memories!

19. When was the last time you saw 6 ?
{sharmaine wong} ages man. was it last year dec or this year march? =o

20. How are 12 & 14 different ?
{cara and amanda lee} yeah. very different. but both of them rock in their own
way. :DDD

21. Is 6 pretty ?
{sharmaine} yeah! my bestie! :D

22. How did you meet 5 ?
{mei an} primary school! BESTIE!! OMG, i really really miss all of you man!!! DDD;

23. Is 1 your bestfriend ?
{jasmine} no, she is my bestest bestest friend!!!! <33333333333

24. Do you hate 12 ?
{cara} of course NOT.

25. Have you seen 4 last month ?
{denise}NOOOOOO, DDDD;!!!! i miss you!!!!

26. What was the last thing you said to 3 ?
{yiqi} dont know? i think we talked about school work? =o

27. Have you been to 5 house ?
{mei an} no.

28. When's the next time you are going to see 10 ?
{Ellen} i see her everyday. cuckoo quiz.

29. Are you close with 13 ?
{nicholas chong} ok la, he's a nice guy. -stop emoing amanda chua- HAHAHA.

30. Have you ever been to a movie with 4 before ?
{denise} yeah duhh. kung fu panda! you two bullies! you and mei an! =ooo

31. Have you ever been into trouble with 8 ?
{Amanda foo} No, i dont think so. :D

32. Would you give 2 a hug ?
{Ren Hao} HAHA. No... hug for what. -.-

33. When have you lied to 3 ?
{chen yiqi} have i? i dont think so.

34. Is 1 good with socializing ?
{jasmine} Yeah!!!!! (I shall leave out the socializing with boys part. -.- )

35. Do you know secrets about 9 ?
{may loh} dont know. i dont think so.

36. Describe the relationships between 12 & 14 ?
{cara and amanda lee} aqquaintance? =D

37. Best thing about your friendship with 9 ?
{may loh} she advices me whenever im in need, she's a great friend and senior.

38. What's the worst thing about 6 ?
{sharmaine} nothing! she rocks!!! <3333

39. Have you ever had a crush on 12 ?
{cara} NO!

40. Does 14 has a stead ?
{amanda lee} she has alot of steads luh. blah blah blahhh.... *ignores lee protests*

41. Have you ever wanted to punch 1's face ?
{jasmine} sometimes, long ago la actually. :D

42. Has 2 met your mother ?
{Ren Hao} I think so. But maybe he doesnt even know that its my mother. hahhaha!

43. How did you get to meet 3 ?
{yiqi} primary school, like we know that the other party existed, thats all. :D

44. Did you ever physically hurt 3 ?
{yiqi}no, i dont think so.

45. Do you live close to 7 ?
{sharlene!}not exactly...

46. What's 8 favourite food ?
{Amanda foo} chicken rice? is it? i always see her eating chicken rice... =/

47. What kind of cars do 1 has ?
{jasmine} a real car. i think this quiz sucks.

48. Have you travelled anywhere with 9 before ?
{may loh} hopefully vienna! :DD

49. If you give 14 a $100, what will (s)he spend it on ?
{amanda lee} i dont know. high chance she will just keep it in a bank. she's a MISER. ;D

DONEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

2009-06-21T05:08:00.000-07:00

Today, is exactly one year when I first joined -MiNt-. Hah, memories. You have played a huge role in my life. Sometimes good, sometimes bad. You all helped me when I was all down, and picked me up. When I thought I was gone for good, and even had suicidal thoughts. You also played a big part of causing my grade's downfall. Ahh, all these will, and always be, part of my memories. Thank you once again, if any of you read this, for everything that you have done to help me. I really appreciate it. Thank you.
Who is kidding who. You all are part of my bittersweet memories. Memories that I can never erase, can never undo nor change. Oh well. Back to reality. *Slaps self* Bye. I guess this will be the last time I'm talking about -MiNt-.

Dream, its all your part of your life journey. I felt like I have recently just woke up from one. Hit the harsh reality worhs...

2009-06-17T21:33:00.000-07:00

HELLO FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS!!!! to my blog: hahahaa, im ULTRA sorry if you are crying. but seriously, i dont care la. im too lazy to update!!!!!

haha, i shall talk about yesterday. I went out. it was so fun! met amy at 10plus, waited for her at bishan mrt station. then i was looking around at people since amy was late. :D you know different ppl are actually quite interesting!! hahaha, maybe next time when i grow old i will take up this new hobby!!!! sitting down there and watch people! its kinda fun really. im not being bian tai or anything hor. :DD

and after we went to orchard. oh yes, before that, when we just walked out of the mrt station, suddenly we head a "BOOM!" and me and amy jumped la! wtheck was that??!! Turns out to be some drums-.- omg, we nearly had heart attack. evil people. we got kinda lost. after about 20 mins, we FINALLY found yishuen at shaw centre!!!!! :DDD she was sitting there, and her popcorn was half empty! ah yishuen eats so FASTT! then we went to the cinema and watched hannah montana! its was super nice! yesyes, i know it sounds childish but i love love love love love hannah montana!!!!! =DDDDD you know, after we walked out of the cinema, me and amy were carrying two half full popcorns! and imagine that yishuen ate half her popcorn in 20 mins! me and amy couldnt even finish the popcorn after 1hour plus! DDD; the popcorn was too sickening sweet. D; after that, we walked around. got lost again, we went to the wrong far east. LOL. one is far east shopping centre and the other is plaza. ah well, sad. so we decided to forget about finding the hair extensions and go and buy it another day. :D

then we took train again to bugis. met up with jasmine and amanda foo! :D we took 2 neoprints! the first one was actually quite nice! but it turned out to be super small! horror la! so sadded. the second neoprint machine is like a miracle liddat. LOL. while we were decorating it, it was not nice. then when it printed out, it was super nice. dont know what happened la. but it was all glittery! :DD yay! i love love love neoprints too!! which brings me to a point, jasmine always say i love everything! yay! spread the loveee!!! :DDDDDD

after that, we went back to the mrt station to meet the others and its off to cip! it was quite fun! :D i shall stop slacking yeah! i <3 the first group! esp grace! <3 and the second group SUCKS. okay well. thats all.
Here's a picture of me and grace and some other kid (sorry =X ) at cip!!!! :

JASMINE LEE LOOK!!!! I POSTED!!!! BECAUSE YOU ASKED ME TO!!!! ARENT YOU TOUCHED?! :DDDDDD YAY!! <3

2009-06-15T23:37:00.001-07:00

heylo ppl! bored! i shall upload pics! since i have wanted to upload them for a long time! :D

canes. reminds me of my childhood days. -.-

me and yishuen! our new pose! <333

lian hua! my grandmother grew it! yay! so nice right?

may may!!!!! <333333333333333

me at my piano teacher's house. LOL.

me! just after i cut bangs! HAHAH. im zilian! i admit it! who said i wasnt? :D

cheryl. (:

myyyy crazy sister!

fried rice! yay! i want to eat it now!

amy! the cip picture as promised! :DDD

my sis. -.-dao face.

me,xiaoyou,yishuen,joce and mrs seet. YAY! :D

valerie, amy ,and yishuen's back. LOL.

ARGH! YOU STUPID DIAMOND LIGHT! MAKE ME CANT SLEEP! I HATE YOUUUUU!!! LOL.

michelle, my viola junior.

me wearing sunglasses. LOL. lameness.

me and yishuen! strings camp! <3

me and my cousin, jolinn! sharlene, why you never take pic with me huh? :DD

CHOU DAVID COOK! COOKIE. D:<

strings camp! after we just bathe! me, yishuen, amy and valerie! =D

okay DONE! hope you enjoyed it! whee!!! back to studying! (:

2009-06-15T05:39:00.000-07:00

go and finish up your ydjc! yay! jiayou! gogogo!

2009-06-14T10:32:00.001-07:00

can someone tell me all the quotes for village by the sea :D ? i give up trying to study.

2009-06-12T02:29:00.000-07:00

im feeling guilty! amanda chua! stop slacking! go study! -fails- roars! you must do better in term 3! no more slacking! =DD go my at least 70%! :DD jiayou!

2009-06-10T06:24:00.000-07:00

Why do I trust you? Why? Well, it's rhetorical isn't it? I need to understand myself, in desperate need of answers. It's irrational. I just did it, without thinking. It's that moment of trust. You are so cold at some time, and so nice to me at others. I dont think you know I am talking about you. (: Maybe I was too trusting? Just please. Forget about everything I told you. I shouldnt have said any of that. Nobody knows me well enough to flame me(with three exceptions) . You are NOT going to know me well. NEVER. EVER. Yesh, people might hurt me on the surface, but their wounds are never deep enough. PLEASE. Forget about it. I DIDNT MEAN FOR YOU TO KNOW ME. Cause underneath this happy-go-lucky plastic face aint a nice one. Trust me, you will regret ever knowing me. FORGET IT. PLEASE PLEASE.

P.S. I didnt say because you rock -.- . I said because......I dont know!!!!!!!!! ROAR!

2009-06-10T05:19:00.000-07:00

Today cip there was this sucky sucky boy. i swear i will never wear this skimpy ever again when i go to this cip. and its not skimpy. amanda lee and valerie think it is. hahaha. i hate cip today. stupid boy. you SCRATCHED the back of my PRECIOUS VIOLA(okay actually not so precious la, but what if i suddenly take an interest in viola then how? then you pay me for the scratch la. dumbass, pervertic boy who only know how to spout vulgarities. -.- ) the back of my viola had maintain the NO SCRATCH sign till today!!!!!!!!!!!!! PISSED! I AM NEVER GOING TO BRING MY VIOLA ANYMORE! D;

URGH. good day turned bad day.

2009-06-10T03:43:00.000-07:00

whee! strings camp was fun fun fun! i esp like the sleeping part and the games! nono, correction, only the part when me and valerie were talking! hahahah! we thought ms foo was oblivious to the world la. she was snoring! :DDD then suddenly she was like, " i still hear whispering..." -.- then we were shocked. stunned. =ooooo cuckoo la! spoil our conversation! roar! so sad la! i couldnt sleep the whole night. valerie was tired, so she went off and sleep. then i sat up and played with my fingers and looked at the shadows. hilarious la. and i also looked at the ceiling and emo. I thought about lots of stuff that I dont think I should have thought about. ah well. jasmine has left my house. no mood to post. shall post more later. bye :D

2009-06-03T03:01:00.001-07:00

yesterday was WONDERFUL! YAY! :D went to east coast park with yanshan, amy, jan, lilin, juniana, lee and yingyin! it was super super super fun! I self invited. =DDDD Omg, i dont regret being thickskinned at all! -.- cus it was super uber fun! yay! hmm, sounds wrong. =_= okay. we played by the sea and took pics! some jump shot! so fun la!!!! =DDD

then, we cycled! its like this uhh, two people cycle on one bicycle thingy. -descriptive writing fail-its super fun! at first, i was like, o.o" NO!! I CANT CYCLE! I kept having to brake, if not I will bang into the trees/grass. The others are evil boobs! They just cycled off without us! Hmph, how can they enjoy themselves without us! DD; Oh well. Anyway, I'm sure Amy was freaked out! But she was super nice about it! She kept encouraging me until I can do it and didnt get pissed or anything when i almost fell! yayy! i love amy! :D Then soon after that I had to leave early, D; , cus my parents wanted to watch angels and demons. Aw, didnt get to rollerskate. Angels and demons was quite nice, but i was very disturbed after that, cus there was alot of blood. yuck.

I REALLY REALLY ENJOYED THE OUTING! let's go again people! wheee!

Just before going there, I just asked Juniana whether she can fetch me, cus i didnt know and thought we were taking bus/mrt. Juniana and her mother were very nice la! So i squeezed into Juniana's car with lilin, amy and yanshan! And we took most of the pics, if not all, with Junian's camera! She sent the pics to us! Yay! Thanks lots Juniana! Love you! :D

Oh yeah, i missed math olympaid. cus i was dumb. i forgot all about it. -.- so, missed it lorhs. haha, when jocelyn called me i was still sleeping. =X oh well. -sees the 10dollars fly away- hahaha. gtg run. bye! :D

2009-05-29T07:25:00.000-07:00

today i went out with jasmine! its was super fun! :D yay! if you want the details go to jasmine's blog! =D i love night of the muesuem 2 ! i love amanda lee too! :D yay okay! done posting! meow. roar. gdnights, sleep tight.

Death, Life, Reality, Dream, Hate, Love? What EXACTLY are you? Answer me will you?! -.-

2009-05-29T05:49:00.000-07:00

Here he was. The once-famous professor who graduated from Oxford University. He sat comfortably in a cheap and sooty black chair and crossed his frail, wrinkled legs. He leant his bald,tired head on the sturdy, ash-grey pillars of the church. He strummed a few chords on his guitar and immersed himselfin singing his favourite song of all time- "Teardrops On My Guitar" by Taylor Swift and took a brief glance at the white box in front of him. There was a sign pasted just above it ' Kindly donate. Please help me. Thank you. ' He lifted his eyes to look at the open, wide sky. Those water-clear eyes. The deep-set emerald green. By far the most striking feature of his face.
Never would he have imagined himself to be like this. To see himself, the once oh-so-ambitious man, reduced to this state. Ice cold chilly winds blew him almost right off his chair. His teeth chattered profusely and he trembled from head to toe. He strummed harder and faster on his guitar in a hopeless attempt to keep himself warm. It was in the middle of winter. Mr Grean looked at himself. Ah, his all-time favourite bleach-white shirt and brown trousers, with black sandals that did not even cover half of his freezing feet.
The church was rather quiet and serene, apart from the distant ringing of bells. It was noon time. Mr Grean stared again at the once hopeful sky, to see that only now it was scorning at his helplessness.
Disgrace. Bitterness. Hatred. Will it ever end? I closed my old, baggy eyes. It was hard to even lift up an eyelid now. He thought to himself. For now, he would just turn away from this cruel reality. For now, he shall escape it, escape from Life and run away from Dreams. Reality check. For now, he told himself, he will imagine that he was a rich young man, void of any troubles in the world.
For now.
For now.

2009-05-28T06:03:00.000-07:00

starting time : 20:31
name : Amanda
sisters : 2
brothers : -
eye Color : Black
shoe size : 6/7?
hair : Brownish black
piercings : 2? (total)
height : wa sehh. dont want answer.
what are you wearing right now?tshirt and shorts.
where do you live?yio chu kang.
favorite number :8
favorite drink : ice lemon tea
favorite month : december
favourite breakfast : -.- i dont eat breakfast.
————————-Have You Ever————————-
broken a bone : no?
been in a police car : no.
been on a plane : yeah.
been in a hot tub : yeah! stupid question.
swam in the ocean : no.
fallen asleep in school : of cus. =D
cried when someone died? : yeah.
fell off your chair : hahahaha. yeah!
sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : LOL, no la. im not lovesick.
saved e-mails : no.
been cheated on : no.
————————-What is————————-
your room like?messy! =D
what is right beside you?one whole stack of my messy books.
what is the last thing you ate?dinner.
———————-Ever Had————————-
chicken pox :no
sore throat : yeah.
stitches : nopes.
broken nose : no.
————————Do You————————–
believe in love at first sight?NO.
like picnics?okay, i like it if its with my family.
wear contact lenses or glasses?glasses.
———————————————————
who was the last person you danced with?myself.
who last made you smile?o.o amanda lee?
————————–Who—————————
did you last yell at?valerie foong. omg, im so sorry.
———-Final Questions————-
what are you listening to right now?nothing.
what did you do today?went to little india and watched global warming thing.
hate someone in your family?no
diamond or pearl?Diamond
are you the oldest?yeah.
indoors or outdoors?INDOORS!——————Today did you———————-
talk to someone you like?yeah!
kiss anyone?no.
get sick?felt like vomiting.
sing?yeah! :D
talk to an ex?zzz. no.
miss someone?yeah. kinda.
eat?dinner lorhs.
—————-Last person who——————
you talked to on the phone?amanda lee.
made you cry?uhh... o.o -dont want to answer.-
went to the movies with?i forgot. long time ago yeah. D;
you went to the mall with?jasmine.
——————Have you——————-
been to Mexico?nope
been to USA?no
——————-Random——————–
have a crush on someone? -not answering either-
what books are you reading right now?angelas and demons.
best feeling in the world?when i have friends around me? =D
future kids names?dont want to think about this now.
do you sleep with a stuffed animal?yes. alot. but i dont hug them. i just throw them at the end of the bed. :D
what’s under your bed?my sis' bed?
favorite sport(s) to watch?tennis!
favorite place :home.
who do you really hate?..... .....
do you have a job?no.
what time is it now?21:00
With however long it took you to complete this, post as“my _ minutes survey"

2009-05-26T06:26:00.000-07:00

stupid chi e-learning. whats wrong with it? stupid stupid stupid. now i can access the freaking website. -.- hahaha. congratulations. i can picture tls yakking at how irresponsible i am not to have completed my e-learning and blah. o.o w/e. listen up yo. im giving up on you, you stupid edulearn. bye. i tried my best. but too bad, i like my piano more. hehes. BYEEE! :DDDDD

no. wait. im too addicted to this freaking comp. okay, i will go home early and practice piano like mad tommorrow and on thurs. yesyes, thats what i will do. for today, i will slack. first time in so many days. ~~~~ :D

2009-05-25T23:05:00.001-07:00

Fine I shall post more. Since I'm freaking bored. !@#$^&*(*&^()(*

okay, 21 may 2009

Today is May Chan's birthday! There was some class quarrel, but I shall not get involved. Anyway, its resolved now. So, yay. I feel very wrong if I say somemore, because it does not concern me. I should keep my big mouth shut. =X oh well. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAY CHAN! AGAIN! IF YOU EVER SEE THIS! YAY LOVE YOU!

22 may, 2009

jubilate! <3<3<3<3<3 :D love love!!! It was super fun!! went to RP at 9. Thanks to whoever who gave me notes, flowers and sweets!!! Halfway through the rehearsal, I only saw black and white and was extremely giddy. Exactly like a few days ago. Wtheck, wads wrong with me man. Then ms quek told me that i should go call my parents to go home. Then I started crying la, cause i didnt want to go home. Aiya, feel so coward now la when i think about it. zzz. Thanks iso and heidi for the get well soon note! :D hmm, lunch and dinner SUCKED. I liked the bubbletea! whee!!!

When i was walking with jasmine to go to 7-11, there was this girl who looked at me. Then passed me Valerie's nametag. I was stunned. hahahaha. I thought she thought that I was Valerie or smth. after that, iso and jasmine went to some place and abandoned me. talked to yanshan. talked about all types of crap. ehh shan, next time must talk even longer kay!!! :D hehes.

during the performance, i was like a joker. after we started the first few phrases of peter hope, i was elated (for dont know what reason) and then i stopped playing. zzz. then i realised i stopped playing, and hurried to cover my mistake. THEN! I was so happy when finally peter hope was over. I forgot everything that Jessalyn told us. And I walked off the stage with Mr Chan. CUCKOO MAN! My sister told me the joker was so funny! until she found out that I was the joker. -.- stupid me!!!

in conclusion, i really enjoyed jubilate yay! cant wait for it next year!

sat, 23 may 2009

Woke up by my sister. My hamster passed away. I can never forget that lifeless sight ever. Super sad. We really loved her alot. Haish. Died of old age I think. God bless you chuchu, may you live a blessed life in heaven. D; then we cried and emo-ed for about an hour....

In the afternoon, we went nanyang and sst open house. Because of my sister-.- . around 6, i had viola lesson. yay. it was alot more fun than usual. mr sze was super nice la. had 1.5 hours of lesson. we spent the extra half hour, urm, talking about stuff. hahahas. happy now, this few days he doesnt scream at me anymore. And his examples are always so funny. oh and cause of his influence, im now crazy over x-men! oh and mr sze, if you ever read this, thanks so much for cheering me up. :D

sun, 24 may 2009

Went to music essentials. No bach suites. =.= sad. changed viola case again. Walked around robinsons. Later on, drove to Pasir Ris to have dinner with my maternal family. Sharlene never talk to me. so sad. hahas. The food was reasonably okay, but very ex luh. and, pasir ris is so far from my house. zzz. tired when i went home. slept.

mon, 25 may 2009

woke up crying. had a nightmare. dreamt about some retarded girl named Candice ganging up with Jasmine, Lee, Amy and Valerie to kill us. esp amy la. She was laughing that evil laugh and holding a knife. Yucks. Then i asked them why they wanted to kill me. They said, cause we hate us through and through. I asked why, and they just started laughing. yishuen was hmm, crying?! hahhaha. oh right, i forgot to mention, yishuen was with me. We were running away from them. Oh, it was raining cats and dogs. and we were thoroughly drenched. hahas. woke up when Valerie was discussing with the others which way me and yishuen will die. scary.

first the pearlyn dreams. and now this. -.- wads wrong with my dreams? i want a happy dream leah. one that got rainbows! and flowers! and sunshine! rabbits! chinchillas! seeing my hamster opening its eyes again! not one that involves my close friends ganging up to kill me. D;

HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY TWIN! YAY YAY YAY! LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU!!!! One year older, one year wiser! Dont keep teasing me about sze okay! May all your dreams come true! :D anyway. today is e-learning day. suck la. giddy. ANTI-ELEARNING.

had piano lesson in the afternoon, it sucked. my piano teacher was giving me a black face. and complaining about me. he said if i didnt practice properly, he will fine me 80 dollars the next lesson. oh well. shall practice. -.- hyperventilating. hyperventilating. hyperventilating. hyperventilating. :D whee!! <>

tues, 26 may 2009.

I AM (ALMOST) FREE FROM E-LEARNING! YAY YAY! :DDDD JUMPS FOR JOY! THIS IS GREATT! SCREW E-LEARNING! :D cant wait for school tmr! I'm also looking forward to strings camp! yay!!!!

re-edit: I dont think I hate St Nicks anymore. yeah, as what Jasmine said, I DO have many good friends. Its just that I dont realise it. I want to stay in St. Nicks. yay. :D

2009-05-25T06:08:00.000-07:00

I LOVE AMY! SHE RAWKS! BEST AHMA IN THE WORLD! LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!!!!!!

2009-05-24T23:14:00.000-07:00

JUBILATE! IT WAS FUN FUN FUN! except for the part where i was the cuckoo joker who walked off the stage. =X yesyes! when im not lazy i will post the pics! wheee! i cant wait for end of term! june hols~ ! love love love! haha, as usual, im lazy to post.

2009-05-16T07:44:00.000-07:00

omg i changed blogskin. so ugly. im changing for jasmine's and gilaine's sake. i do not want them to go blind. hmm, today had vjc test. yeah. im happy. i doubt i will get in. but im still happy. because i saw daniel teo. im not happy because i saw him, maybe i was. o.o wadever la still, im happy. i never thought i would see him again. im shocked man. stupid guy.

ok this is a super lame post -.-

2009-05-16T06:42:00.000-07:00

i have a new female idol! :D ARIEL LIN!

2009-05-15T07:22:00.000-07:00

yoh! first time i am ACTUALLY blogging. and not crapping on a few sentences! omg! im so proud of myself! :DDDD

stupid napfa. i hate the teacher. thanks to her, now i have stomach cramps. walao. did like, 80+ situps in one day? she so smart she come and do la. i bet she 20 also cannot then she will give up liao la. torture man! ANGRY. D;

This paragraph is dedicated to ISOBEL TAN. read it if you want. yay! hey boob, thanks for being such a greatttt and wonderful desk partner! i really enjoyed term 2 alot because of you! my pen(s) ink also all start disappearing! so sad that this term is coming to an end. oh yeah, sorry if you got angry with me last time. Like Valerie always says-.-, I am sensitive. Thank you so much for lending me your zig pens and for all your advice! You are the greatest desk partner anyone could have! I love you lots and lots! :D

today, during strings, we sightread Peter Hope. Supposed to practice(but obviously im slacking-.- or else what am i doing here) and play it as encore piece for jubilate. jiayou man! 2nd syf! D;

ohh, and im quite disappointed with my mep practical. wads over is over anyway. cant change it! just take it as a learning experience and do better next tym! yeah! jiayou! :D

vjc test tmr! im scared. anyway. vjc is what i want. i hope i do get in. which is impossible. -.- but im going to try. no matter what. :D

looking forward to JUBILATE! ONE MORE WEEK YEAH! :D gtg le, byeeeee!!!!!!

2009-05-14T06:40:00.000-07:00

boo! im going to get a heart attack! mep results! all 3 of them! *faints* i am scared-.- die man.

2009-05-10T06:15:00.000-07:00

ouyang feng is so funny! he is such a joker! he was like on the mountain " 你打不倒我的！！！！" look like zhou botong, if not cuter man, then in the end, he go sot and killed himself. and he seems evil but so adorable!!!! :D i love him i love him i love him! he is so funny! whenever im down, he makes me laugh.

i dont feel like leaving st nicks after all. yeah. i wanted to go vjc/njc. get out of this freaky school. but when i really think about it, i cant really bear to leave st nicks. all my friends and teachers. confused.

-.-

2009-05-08T07:13:00.000-07:00

I AM HAPPY. :D finished. lazy me. yeahh. :D

2009-05-03T03:33:00.000-07:00

omg, im so slow. i just saw this tag from ying yin. and it was like 2 months ago. ok w/e.

tagged by: ying yin (:
1. Beside your lips. where is the favourite spot to get kissed?
Cheek
2. How do you feel when you woke up this morning?
err... energetic? i woke up at 11. tsk.
3. Who was the last person you took a photo with?
xiaoyou
4. Would you consider yourself to be spoiled?
kinda
5. Would you ever donate blood?
depends.
6. Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex?
yes.
7. Do you want someone dead?
yeahh.
8. What does your last test message say?
I rmbred the teacher saying smth abt it postponed to next week. Lol. Aiya I dun care much about napfa anw. =X i dont feel like studying for any tests. Im lazy.
9. What are you thinking of right now?
-not answering this-
10. Do you wish someone was with you right now?
yes. :D im alone in this room. so bored.
11. What time did you go to sleep last night?
11 plus
12. Where did you buy the T-shirt you are wearing now?
o.o dunno. not i buy one.
13. Is someone on your mind right now?
yeah.
14. Who was the last person to text you?
Xin Jing <3
10 PEOPLE TAGGED TO DO THIS QUIZ :
1. xinjing
2. xinyun
3. denise :D
4. kingsley
5. amy
6. may
7. jasmine
8. bumpy
9. amanda foo
10. mei an
15. who is 3 having a relationship with?
thats what I would like to know. who ah?
16. Is 3 a male or a female?
Female
17. If 7 & 10 get together will that be a good thing?
NO. cannot. of cse its a bad thing. very bad.
18. What is Number 1 studying about?
she just msged me she was slacking. but i think she is studying acc and history. D; and IM SLACKING.
19. Is Number 4 single?
yeah i think.
20. Say something about Number 5.
my beloved ahma! <3
21. What do you think about Number 3 & 6 together ?
NO WAY.
22. Describe Number 9
she is very nice! :D
23. What will you do if Number 6 & 7 right?
meaning?
24. Do you like Number 8?
okok la. he belongs to jasmine.

(dont do if you dont want to. :D )

2009-05-03T00:43:00.000-07:00

im too lazy to post again. post syf laziness. or maybe its because im always lazy, and syf changed it for about 3-4 weeks. and now im back to being lazy. LOL.

ytd went to science centre. amy and jasmine didnt go! it was boringgg~~ not because they didnt go. i mean, the class is boring. tsk, i shall be smart next tym too. i shall pon it !!! :DDDDDDDDDD

2009-05-01T06:43:00.000-07:00

yay! today went to level outing! it was fuun fun fun! spider's webbb! :DDDD got real spider leh! woo! hahahaha! i love chomp chomp's hokkien mee! <333 we also went macs!

went to buy hermit crab for my sister's bdae! quite fun luh. saw super cute chinchillas! omg! im SO going to get them! LOVE LOVE LOVE! ok done. see im so lazy to post! -.- byeeee!!!!!!

2009-04-29T05:15:00.000-07:00

Hello (: today was syf day. thanks to all who gave me notes! :D so encouraged!

hmm, well we got a gold. yeah it was not our desired result. But what really matters is that we tried our very very best and fought till the very very end!! And our extra practices and stuff really did work. We wont regret not practicing hard cse we know we did and we are proud of it! At least we got a gold. We are already considered lucky and count our blessings that our Britten saved us! OMG! If Britten was alive I might just kiss him!! We played so much better than we were supposed to. Rounds- urgh. Screwed it totally. DDD; rush rush rush. I felt like I was in a dream. When I tried to recall what I was doing, I cant even remember. I dont even remember I was playing it. Except for the pizz part which I was missed it totally. Aww man. I think I just blanked out for Rounds. D;

Mr Chan was so nice all the way! I really appreciate it that we have such a nice conductor! He still let us have BBQ! Omg, that was so sweet.

Anyway, we did it all TOGETHER, as one team. :D I'm kind of happy with the outcome, considering that there was only one GWH... Despite screwing up rounds, we got a gold! Thats a good thing! The only sad part was letting down our seniors, classmates and school. I really hope they understand the situation and not blame us on it. DD;

IT'S OVER. FINALLY. YAY. Now. it's back to normal life. Feels kinda weird not going down for recess practice anymore. =XXX oh well. looking forward to jubilate!!!! STRINGERS, LET'S SHOW THEM THAT WE, DERSERVE A GOLD WITH HONOURS! WOOOO! <3333 i love strings! forever! one for all, all for one!!!!! :DDDDDD

2009-04-28T06:13:00.000-07:00

yesh agreed with jasmine! *comes back to reality and kicks neverland to the back of her mind* whee! JIAYOU!!! I LOVE JASMINE AND EVERYONE!!! <33333333333333

ONE FOR ALL. ALL FOR ONE! !!!! LET'S SHOW THEM WE CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!!

2009-04-28T05:28:00.001-07:00

JASMINE HERE. IN REPLACEMENT OF AMANDACHUA'S SOUL WHICH IS SOMEWHERE FLOATING ARD IN NEVERNEVERLAND, ACCORDING TO HER CUCKOONESS. anw, im here to prove that i will try my best tmr! i will play my best, i will not rush, i will not give up. i will not despair. i will not let may down, i will prove to everyone that i, make a diff. MOST IMPTLY, I WILL PLAY LIKE I NVR DID B4 AND NVR REGRET HOW I PLAYED. WE, WILL GET GWH, TOGETHERNESS.

2009-04-27T05:46:00.000-07:00

2 more days. We can do it. :D i shall not hate anybody. oh and jasmine, if you feel like, post for me. im practically dying so i cant post much anymore. yay, thank you.

anyway. today ying yin asked me a question, " why is your life so full of troubles? " i was like momentarily shocked. i never realised that my life DOES have kinda lots of trbl. and the prob? it lies with myself. like what may said. its always myself, myself and myself. i always cause trbl and hurt to other ppl but i dont even realise it. tsk, how naive. and i cant believe myself. what have i done. i told valerie something i never should have even mention. wtheck. i cant take back what i said. not like she will tell it out but still. i knew it. im a blabbermouth and my mouth is so big, like what may and jasmine always say.

i got some $50 cash voucher. i was thinking about the past few days events then suddenly mrs seet called my name. i was like wtheck. i dont even know why ppl are clapping or why my name is called. then somewhere in my brain registered that i won something. then i was like oh, oh, okay. mrs seet asked me how i felt. pfft. want to know the truth. i didnt feel anything. so emotionless. the drug contest was actually about ME. except for the drug part. i was writing about myself then. yeah so whats so great about writing an emo story and getting $50? i dont want it. i just want someone who will understand me and not just go hot and cold towards me. ure like so nice, the next moment so cold. i dont understand it can.

im disappointed in myself la. wtf. today felt so cheated. D; i wouldnt stay back if i knew mr chan was not coming. well, im going to change. im going to prevent more hurt. i dont think i can take it anymore. im gonna be a loner and isolate myself. *10m circle around myself* whats the point of having friends. so nice in the front yet so mean in the back. Just keep making me cry this few days. or maybe its just the syf stress thats making me think too much. no matter what it is, i dont care. wtheck.

to iso, sorry about today. i didnt mean that you think like that. what i just meant is, people make me feel like they just want me to stay in st. nicks just because if not there will be one less violist. thats all. and i feel so worthless. they make me feel like they only want me to stay because im a Sze student or smth? so why should i stay in st nicks just to please them and play the freaking viola?! nobody even likes me for ME anyway.

note: to jasmine and may, i dont need counselling, thanks for your concern. :D Its just the way i decided to be after struggling for so long. dont counsel me ok. i know you are alr VERY VERY SICK AND ANNOYED with me. =D

2009-04-24T23:42:00.000-07:00

I LOVE MAY AND JASMINE A LOT!

2009-04-24T05:33:00.000-07:00

hahaha! 5 more days! go strings! GWH! =DDDDDD yayyyy!!!!!!!!

2009-04-18T00:36:00.000-07:00

wow wow wow. bitch bitch bitch. hah. nvm i shall not talk about IT. because she's a pissy and not worth talking about. :D

hahaha, so thanks to amy for clearing up my mind. <3

ytd, during strings, there was a very inspirational story shared by mrs tham. well, at least, it was inspirational to me (because i dont listen during assembly and im talking) . =X go vanessa! jiayou! :D now im so motivated!!!

jasmine, dont give up, they just want you to practice more. im sure they will let you in. though i also dont agree with their stupid rounds and rounds of audition. =/

11 days more.

2009-04-15T06:07:00.000-07:00

JIAYOU! I CAN DO IT! MR CHAN IS A BLOCK OF WOOD! JIAYOU!!!!!! WHEE :D

2009-04-14T06:30:00.000-07:00

today there's strings. very tired and had a massive headache. halfway through strings the whole floor seemed like it was spinning. no choice, had to put down my viola. luckily, mr chan didnt question me. i might get so embarrassed if he starts question. high chance he didnt see it la. if he see, he will surely question. haha. so yay.:DD

now, everyday, i think im so pathetic. my grades are dropping and im gazing at them not trying to grab back my A1s as im too busy deluded in the void of viola music. tsk tsk. AMANDA CHUA! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HUH? seriously. i dont know what the fuck im doing. wtf la. i should stop practicing so much on my viola. and move my ass and start doing work.

for now im just waiting. waiting, for the auditions. waiting, to go crazy out of stress. waiting, for maths test(so not relevant-.-). what if i screw up the auditions? wont my chance be taken away from me just like that? haiz. im confused. not knowing which step to take and which path it will lead to. for now, i shall just sit here and stone. im so tired. i tried, i really really tried. i need/have to get in.. will i? im so unsure. mayb its just because i only have 1 year of viola experience and also because i have limitations due to my talentless nature. =.= i just want to sleep. Forget all the stress and stop moving my hands to prevent boob from smacking them.

15 more days. GOLD WITH HONOURS. <3

2009-04-10T05:58:00.000-07:00

im not so sad now, thanks to may, a.foo, jasmine, val.f and yiqi. (: oh and patrick. for your lame questions. ;D smile, dont give up amanda, cse its not only you. other ppl care about you too! (: i shall overcome this setback and continue with life! =D yay!

oh and i love may and jasmine! fellow violists! and i love the piano! but no other fellow pianists! because piano is a solo instrument. and when you play it, its just YOU,YOUR PIANO,YOUR IMAGINATION,YOUR FREEDOM and nothing else. ;D yay. im going to prove to my piano teacher that im not siao. =X

HOPE . -.-

2009-04-09T07:16:00.000-07:00

im very very very upset. and disappointed. well, it started kinda happy, cse mrs seet implied that I was the top 5 for speech and yea, i was happy (: then cca time. drastic mood change. yes, i know you say you are giving us last chances, but dont you think its too late for that? you should tell us whether we can play or not earlier, so as to prevent practicing on false hope and dreams. now, i am so shocked and dazed by today's events. you think this is our LAST chance?! The blow was so big you know. your brains work very weirdly and seriously, oh well, i personally think its quite messed up. now you cause people to cry and we waste our time for nothing. at least, be kind to us. set our expectations right la. haish. wadever.

anyway. may and mr sze(like you will ever see this) if you do see this, (mr sze yo u CANNOT see this!) yeah i think im gonna disappoint you AGAIN. im so sorry. im sick and tired of living on this small thing called hope. when mr chan said that i was so crushed and the hope in me all melted and destroyed. It hurts. I dont want to hope again, and in turn get all bleary eyed and disappointed again. but, i will try. because i promised you i will try. so i will (:

sad sia. haish. i hate this school's ruling. screw it. screw this school. i want to ip away. i hate everything about this school. wad the fuck. fucking pissed off day. i wanna sleep. curl in bed and dream about candies and fairies. stupid harsh reality.

2009-04-08T06:38:00.000-07:00

THIS POST IS (MOSTLY) DEDICATED TO A BIG FAT BOOB WHO PROBABLY WONT READ THIS ANYWAY.

"OMG! I CANNOT STAND YOU GIRLS! YOUR REACTIONS ARE SO... SLOW!!!! HURRY UP!!! AIYYOOO *shakes head* ???? HOW AM I TO WORK WITH YOU ALL! *SCREAMS* STOP DOING LIAO LA! EXPECT THE WHOLE CLASS TO WAIT FOR YOU IS IT? WADS WRONG WITH YOU?" STUPID MOLLY. I NEED TO TELL YOU SMTH YOUR REACTION IS EVEN SLOWER THAN MINE CAN. YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT. WE ARE STUDENTS CAN. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME WE ARE DOING THIS EXPERIMENT. YOU THINK WHAT HAR? SMARTASS. MAYB WE GET YOU TO THE THE FKING MEP TEST LA. THEN WE COMMENT :

" OHHH MY GOOSHHH MOLLY, YOU CANT EVEN DO SUCH A FUCKING SIMPLE QUESTION RIGHT?! THAT WAS THE EASIEST! WHERE IS YOUR COMMON SENSE?! *SHAKES HEAD* " BITCH AND FREAK OF NATURE. STUPID COSMETIC FACE. LOOKS SO UGLY. LIKE A BOOB. SUCH A BIG FAT BOOB. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ CUP LA YOU. ME AND ISOBOOB HAD A FUN TYM DRAWING YOU LEH! (:

hehes. i hate molly! tu`se morta! =.= you cb. knn la you. i tell you wad. in case of a fire, you wont have the slowest reaction. you wanna know the fucking reason? -.- cause before you even HAVE a reaction, the fire already burn you down. you already fall to ashes. you big fat boob.

omg. im so in love with the word 'fuck.' and 'boob' i got influenced by isobel, calista and gilaine. =X hahas. fuck is not a bad word anyway. wads so bad about using it. oh gosh.

todae there was speech. yay. i think i did okay. =DD isobel was so nice! she was squishing my hand until got marks! whee whee whee! i love isobel! desk partners! she keep making me laugh! definitely makes life alot more interesting for me! =D lovee isobel!!!! =DDDDD YAY!!!! shall go do lit! MACBETHHH!!! bye. iso love!

to someone: >> my aim is all A1s. its just an AIM. is it so wrong. stop saying that. its making me fucking pissed off can!!?

p.s. patrick john chia i dun like you. you are so evil. o.o ping pong show! i shall go see wads so nice about it one day haha. but im not allowed to watch tv shows. =X

2009-04-07T07:29:00.000-07:00

WE LIVE AND BREATHE GOLD WITH HONOURS! WE CAN DO IT! JIAYOU!!! this para is dedicated to may loh! i really hope that we will get gwh!!! i really really hope one day you will tell me that i have improved alot and that i made you proud!

SN STRINGS, WE KNOW WE RAWK! (: GWH!!

did macbeth today. forgot lines. aww man. D;

amanda foo : > I SO DO NOT LOVE MR SZE! -.- wth. stupid z cup boob isobel. im SO going to kill her.

amy : > who said i wear mature dress? LAWL (:

<3<3, amanda chua (: im a happy girl today!

2009-04-05T20:21:00.000-07:00

ytd went to president's command concert. showcase 11 outstanding talented singaporeans. very nice. (: 16 and under not allowed actually. but wadever. i still got in. ;D

there was stefanie sun.-.- her song sucked.

and JJ LIN!! <333333 live! and its free!!!! and his voice rocks!!! now i have a new love for jj lin!! omg omg! lovelovelovelove! hahahaha. and he is so cool! LOL. i think now he is more cool than federer. jj lin rawks! getting influenced by cheryn. hahahas.

anw, today i am sick. sians. chiong for hw and for macbeth tmr. jiayou! there's strings prac tmr. so not looking forward to it.

2009-04-01T05:34:00.001-07:00

thanks for the sectionals may may! you rawk! jiayou for syf!

you also la, miss chan yiqi, get well soon too! (:

2009-03-31T05:46:00.000-07:00

band got gold with honours. gratzz!!! <33 todae was syf rehearsal at republic poly.

omg. i would have done ANYTHING to change mr chan's face. -.- DISAPPOINTMENT WAS ALL OVER IT. haiz. why cant we just, for once, make mr chan proud? why is always lyk that. i know i have a part in it too. i suck, and obviously i need to practice more. alot more. "look, you need to practice alot more. if we are going to continue like that, we might not even get a gold, not to mention a gold with honours. " i will never ever forget those words. i feel like i let string orchestra down.

on the way to school, i heard some people complaining about how they cant face people if they get silver. like WADEVER. complain so much for WAD. YOU, AS SECTIONAL LEADERS, never even conduct sectionals and you still dare complain. bhb sia. i feel damn pissed off. why do you say such things? since you don't want us to get silver/gold, then aren't you going to do anything about it? at least do your part? NO. so stop complaining. change it. we can always make the impossible possible right?!

you still said " our standard was NEVER gold with honours. i dun think we will ever get gold with honours. " of course you keep thinking that it wont come true. a gold with honours doesnt come flying into anybody's hands with hard work. we are all in it together. ;D

to may: yeah i love mr sze (not in dirty way) too. he really rawks. <3 teacher's day present yay! =DD hahas. and i will try my very very best not to let you or him down ok? we will strive hard for syf! && im not mature. you just cleared up my thoughts thats all.